Chez Moi

 
I flicked open yesterday’s Metro on the way to my morning train and was shocked big time to see news of Heath Ledger’s death. What a tragedy! I thought he was fantastic in Brokeback Mountain and was really looking forward to Dark Knight. What a waste!

What a busy life it must be, to lead the life of the Indian Moral Police? Never a dull moment in their life, putting out moral fires in every corner of the town, saving the innocent public from the amohttp://im.sify.com/entertainment/movies/images/jan2008/sriyafunction200.jpgral denizens that are out to besmirch the Indian Culture and the rest of it. They have barely sat down after the Shilpa Shetty kissy kissy fiasco, only to bounce up over Shriya’s dress (or lack of) sense.

Actress Shriya, who played Rajini’s love interest in his hit film Sivaji, has offended the sensibilities of the moral junta by wearing a ’skimpy outfit’. She has made the conservative heart of Chennai nearly stop by daring to appear in an “off-white dress that rode up her knees while she sat, and a plunging neckline that highlighted her hour glass figure”, that too at a function graced by the Chief Minister Karunanidhi. What a hussy!

Instead of setting an effigy of hers on fire or blowing up a few buses like they normally do, this time they actually resorted to the law! Quelle Surprise! The Hindu Makkal Katchi actually complained to the police that Shriya has offended the Hindu culture and may the long of the arm reach out, grab her and throw her in the slammer? Even more gaspably, the police declined the invitation saying it ain’t part of their job description!!

How can one make these up? Only in India, I tell ya!

I am a big time fan of Vikram. Having met him once early in his career, soon after his first hit Sethu, I was so charmed by his wit and manners than I have been a staunch fan since. Obviously, then, I have been looking forward to his next release Bheema, after a two-year hiatus.

I got my hands on the songs as soon as they were released and though I felt that Harris Jeyraj has dealt a winner this time around too, I cannot say I am overly pleased with the music directors’ penchant for making non-Tamil singers sing songs in Tamil movies. The song Ragasiya Kanavugal is a case in point. The female singer, instead of singing “azhagiya mirugam” (beautiful beast), sounds like she’s saying “azhugiya mirugam” (rotten beast).

Listen to it yourself and tell me if you agree or not.

My son just told me he is bored. “Life is boring” are his exact words.

When a 5 year old chucks that line at you, what the hell do you do?

Any pointers?

A few months back, Reader’s Digest published a study of the British National Health Service and though the results weren’t shocking, it still sent a jolt to see in black and white what you have suspected all along: if you think the day-time service is pants, then the nighttime is nothing but diabolical. The long waits, lack of facilities and other niggles aside, the fact that one can never get a decent health service, because, ironically, it itself is ailing, is almost laughable. ‘Almost’ because it sure isn’t laughing matter to be told that unless you are bleeding from four places, you are not classified as an emergency is not what you want to hear when you are ill and in desperate need of medical help.

The one time I was in hospital in Britain (touchwood!) was when I had my son six years back. The night nurse was surly, grumpy and wasn’t much of a reassuring sight to a scared first time mum-to-be. Extremely matter-of-fact and brusque, she was the nursing equivalent of “wham! bam! out you get!”. To say I was pleased when the shift changed at 7 AM and with it, brought a smiling, Scottish midwife was an understatement. The following night when I was left with a newborn, I wasn’t the picture of confidence. When I buzzed a midwife to ask if she could hand me my son from his cradle as my bottom was sore with the episiotomy stiches and wasn’t feeling too sure about my ability to transfer him safely to cradle to lap, I got a stinging rebuke for disturbing the other patients and herself, for such a trivial task! If I wanted my baby, well then I better help myself as there were far more important jobs she had to do, like feeding the infant she had in her arms, for a start.

I did after sweating bullets, shocked by the sharp words.

Another time, my husband was ill and on the advice of the emergency nurse on the NHS Direct helpline, he went to the local hospital at 9 PM or thereabouts. He should have taken the nurse’s suggestion of an ambulance but not wanting to create a mega scene, he went with a mate. Had he done that, he would probably seen a doctor that night. Instead, he sat in the waiting room with drunks, assorted moaning and bleeding people for more than four hours by which time, after being coughed on by most of the ill people in the South East of England, he stated he felt much better and came back home.

A former acquaintance had some horror stories to narrate after her delivery. Deciding to stay overnight in the hospital in the hope of some pain relief proved to be a serious error of judgement. When her husband and mother visited her the following morning, they were shocked to find her bed empty and no one having a clue where she had got to. They finally tracked her down in one of the bathrooms - sitting in a rapidly cooling tub of water, where she had been for the past hour or so, following the directions of a harried midwife when she complained of unbearable pain. It took the mother and husband all their energy to get her out - she was big and was a snug fit - and not too early too, as the baby crowned within seconds!

In the past seven years of living here, I have heard many more tales of NHS ineptitude and am in complete agreement with the survey. I know the overworked staff are not to blame - well, not completely anyway. Much help is needed, fast.

Question is, will anything ever be done enough to alter the current state of affairs?