Chez Moi

What do you think of when you say ‘vathiyaar’ (purohit / Brahmin priest)? What image pops into your mind? Well, I generally think of this rotund person, poonool-ed, with an impressive kudumi (pony tail) and a carrying voice. Well now one can add ‘photo savvy’ and ‘inspired by Mani Ratnam’ to this profile.

Last Friday, I got up at the wee hours of the morn (what else would you call 3.00 AM?) to sit bleary-eyed at an Upanayanam (sacred thread) ceremony. That was the first time I learnt that some folks other than Brahmins also prefer the groom to be poonool-ed. Since I had always been under the surmise that doing so ensures their status as Brahmins, this seemed to be a pointless exercise for the non-Brahmins to get upto. But if I am getting a free meal and a chance to take one of my never-used-before collection of silk sarees out of the wardrobe, who am I to complain?

The vaathiyaar’s ringing voice at that ungodly hour (pardon the pun!) carried on for miles and woke up the crows sleeping in the tree outside, neighbours desperate to finish their 8-hour quota as well as P, sleeping soundly upstairs, who complained that some ‘loud voice disturbed him and woke him up’. Even as he bullied his hapless victims into tying their tongues into knots, pronouncing the various unfamiliar Sanskrit mantras, the ‘kalla poonool‘ (emergency thread for the renegers) addition didn’t seem to faze him an iota.

But what impressed me the most was his ability to judge the perfect camera shot and arrange the cast members accordingly so as to be assured of the perfect photograph.

“Maami, setha ippadi thirumbungo!” (aunty, please turn this way) admonished he, when an errant maami blocked self and the newly-anointed Brahmin with her ample behind.

“Maama, maamikki ippadi kumkum vechi vidungo!” (uncle, put kumkum on wifey’s forehead just so) on advised the chap with one maama decided to make use of his free left hand.

He was also the consummate multi-tasker. Armed with a mobile phone, he proceeded to take calls for future appointments whilst directing the main cast of members by miming, pointing and directing. One wonders what he would accomplish with the help of bluetooth and a Blackberry! Gen X vaathiyaars eh what?