Chez Moi

About to drink your afternoon cuppa? Don’t! It may well contain more chemicals than your favourite cola brand. Surprised? Well, I was too, after reading this article in TOI.

So our friendly neighbourhood cow is more harmful than the coloured water. Hmm, I have to admit, I really cannot accept that as a fact. Detractors could argue that it could purely be because of all that is associated with milk - milk is almost a synonym for purity, isn’t it? Milk-teeth, innocent as a babe smelling of milk (well, paal manam maara kozhandai, in Tamil), milk of human kindness…, well you get my drift.

The author, in his piece, states that humans are the only beings that drink the milk of other species long after they have been weaned off their mother. While this is true, the statement cracked me up. In my mind’s eye, I could see a tiger cub standing in queue outside a cow shed, patiently waiting his turn. Of course no other species drinks the milk of other animals - the whole argument is ridiculous!

The very idea of giving milk a bad press seems quite crazy to me. So, what is so wrong with milk anyway? If it is the concept of antigens and what nots, then what would happen to all the meat eaters? These days, one can eat anything from a garden variety chicken to zebra or kangaroo meat. Doesn’t that bring in the baddies present in those beings into the human chain? Is veganism the answer then?

When I went on a holiday to Amsterdam a couple of years back with my family, my son happily guzzled down bottle after bottle of yummy cow’s milk (the cows there were huge, let me tell you!) and was happy as Larry! He didn’t touch a single solid food item, barring a few McChips but was none the worse for it cos good ole milk kept his tum full. Now I have this geezer telling me that it is a big no-no!

Let me unravel this yarn and see how far it goes - we say ‘bye bye’ to milk. OK then - next to follow would be curds (I can imagine my granny’s reaction if her daily thayir sadam is taken off the menu!), cheese, chocolates, cream, cakes, doughnuts, pizza.. in short, all that is nice and good in this world! What does that leave out for poor ole vegetarian me? Grass! Great!

But what worries me is not the men, women and children guzzling down milk by the gallons - Lord knows, living in our towns and cities, they would have immunity against almost all of the known and most of the unknown germs as well. I am worried about our Gods who drink milk - they wouldn’t have any protection against pesticide-laced cow juice, now, would they?